Twunts.

My BT bill is currently available to me online. Wanting to double check the details, I found I was locked out (five incorrect login attempts - how queer!).

So I email BT and ask what to do. Chappie who responds is quite helpful, but advises me that he needs to know my account number. "Fine", says I. "Where do I find that?"

"Your account number can be found on your telephone bill."

As I said. Twunts.

Doom.

Actually, this is pretty cool.

Imagine a slow, lingering death as you watch the video I am aout to present you. What happens occurs over the course of many months, but you cannot escape it - it will catch you. And there may be some linen in the background too. Sorry about that.

The video is here.

Breaking News.

It's a big old world, and horrible things happen all the time for reasons well out of anyone's control.

But seriously, why?